Tag Archives: i was going to leave a long comment but

ng + afp = less than three

So when I was a teenager I got into Tori Amos.  We’ll talk about why or why not that is later this week.  As a result of being into Tori Amos, in college-ish I became familiar with Neil Gaiman.  After college I started actually reading his stuff (not just the liner notes for Strange Little Girls).  One year for Christmas my (not-yet-then) husband purchased me the short story collection Fragile Things, with the aforementioned SLG inserts as a part of them.  (As for his liner notes, many of them are better than some but not all of the songs on that album; sorry you guys, but Tori’s cover of “Heart of Gold” is among the worst of all time.  “Reigning Blood”, however, is a thing to behold.)

“October in the Chair” is one of my favorite bedtime stories.

Anyway.  Almost two years ago I found Neil on twitter.  And thus found Amanda Palmer, and was like “WTF why haven’t I been listening to her for years!?”  (I know why – I was too preoccupied with twee & Sonic Youth throughout college.)

I’ve been rabidly following their relationship like it’s a tabloid, proving again that people writing their own shit on twitter is so much better than 90% of mainstream news publications.  And just yesterday, Palmer posted their epic, epic wedding blog, marking their one year anniversary.

EPIC.  http://blog.amandapalmer.net/post/15120706154/the-wedding-blog

Two things that she writes apply to well, everyone and everything.

nowadays, at some level, everybody loves a bride.
and everybody loves a bride, i think, because a bride symbolizes hope.

in a world filled with NO NO NO NO NO and fear and terror and doubt, a bride fills up the space in the minds eye as a giant white tulle YES, and you don’t need to know the romantic backstory. somehow, through some miraculous chain of events, this woman has decided to throw herself into a life commitment. and it means something different now than it did 100, even 50, years ago. because nowadays she has a choice.

SIGH.  I walked down the street in my white tulle poof on my wedding day and felt exactly exactly exactly that way.

Also, this is the kind of house I want to have one day:

the third inspiration was to call upon neil’s other writer friends, michael chabon and ayelet waldman, whose home we’d already been welcomed into the year before.
michael and ayelet have a kind of a dream-home, filled with four astoundingly awesome children, random instruments, rugs, books and all manner of homey-goodness. we asked if they would have us and armistead and lance and company over to dinner and by the way get married right before we eat and by the way would rosie possibly mind being our flower girl. they said yes, and rosie, age six, began aggressively plotting her outfit. things were officially underway.

(Yeah, we plan on one day having children, and I totally want to have a cadre of little girls who aggressively plan outfits.)

Anyway, the whole piece is beautifully wrought.  Insightful and just wonderful.  This is why people still get married.

Also, a video of AFP playing with the Boston Pops, as she mentions earlier in the post.

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A Pro’s guide to online dating

Yeah, I said it. I’m a pro. Well, I met some guy on OKCupid and am marrying him in less than four months. (Shit!)

Jezebel did a guide to online dating, and creating your perfect profile. Which is interesting, and it’s also interesting to read comments from people (as I am a habitual comment reader, on nearly everything I visit on the web with the exception of cracked.com) who are at the start of it all.

You get this thrill of attention when you first turn to online dating. Like many places in life, you get plenty of attention for being a n00b. This never comforted me, actually, until I turned to the world of online dating. I was never very accomplished in my first year of anything: high school, college, professional life. Being an older sibling had something to do with it, as I had grown up having to wait for things when my 5 years junior brother expected to receive everything without working for it. I always tried to understand my role, and play it cool my first year. Take over my second or third.

But not with online dating. I was the hot new girl on the block. When I first became active on OKCupid in 2008, it was like a window had been opened to a world that was made just for me. A somewhat attractive, nerdy girl who loved music and had a healthy appreciation for pretentious books and movies, and who wasn’t reluctant or difficult to read? Psh. I felt like I was a thousand nerdboys dream come true, and I relished in it.  (Read: I also really needed it at the time.)

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Wrong again, Cracked!

(Alternately titled: my mom & my fiance totally freaking rule.)

Let’s lay it out here.  I read a lot of Cracked.com – how many self-proclaimed nerdy 20somethings don’t?  Judging by my facebook livefeed, not a lot.

from 3 Rexes Jewelry on Etsy

But I’m going to be mean for a moment.  One of their potentially token female writers just put up an article/list about how much engagement ring shopping sucks.  And yeah, I have to agree just a little bit.  It sucks just as much as having to explain to a totally disinterested 8th grade music appreciation class exactly what Kanye West is trying to convey in the song “Diamonds from Sierra Leone”.  Spectacularly failed lesson plan there.

However, everything else I’m going to say here is positive.  I have a wonderful engagement ring story to share.  My fiance did just about everything right in the purchasing process.  He was diligent and creative.  And it all started by following a very simple edict: he asked my mother.

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