Today, while at work, exhausting things were happening and making me cranky. And some of them have to do with religion.
That should not be, whatsoever where I work, and I like where I work because religion plays no part in what we do. Or at least, it absolutely should not.
But today, it did, and I got mansplained to by some preacher as to why kids act a certain way, and for the sake of being affable I thanked the dude for the work he does with our kids. Because often, religious workers do great things for many kids.
Religion is not all hurt. Religion helped me through a lot when I was younger. I was little Catholic girl, CCD superstar (my nun teacher told my mother I was “brilliant” close to my confirmation), sang in the children’s choir, played in handbells forever and absolutely adored it, and even directed a chime choir when I was in high school. Loved it all. It got me through a lot.
I guess it came with growing up relatively poor, or having good role models, that I don’t tie my self worth to having a fancy car or fancy clothes (although I do have a lot of clothes – many of them still secondhand) or how much money I make.
But how do people define their self-worth? How much you mean to your friends? How much you mean to your husband (wife/significant other/etc.)? What a good mother you are? How clean your house is? How healthy you are? How much you contribute to charity? How much you know? How educated you are? How much your job, or your beyond job activity contributes to society as a whole?
The job thing and the education thing contributes a great deal to how I tend to feel about myself. As an overachiever child, this plays out in bizarre ways in adulthood.
T-storm talked a lot awhile ago about Erikson’s theories of lifespan development. I never considered a career as a psychologist, but of all the things he’s come home with from his counseling grad classes, this to me is the most interesting. Hooray lifespan development!
(This is also kind of funny, as we re-watched Scott Pilgrim vs. the World last night, full of slow motion silhouettes indicating the vs. battles. Now I’m going to think of things like shame & stagnation dissolving into a giant flurry of coins.)